a punch to the face

you can hear about something and think you understand
but until you experience what you think you understand
you cant fully understand it
purpose, life is all about purpose
why are you here
what are you doing
why are you doing it
a very important concept to grasp
what are you doing right now?
sitting in front of a computer typing truths that i found
in the hope that doing so will push me forward in life
truth from experience, a no greater truth
what is the best way to live and live it
but you must understand
my brain is closed off to a vast amount of knowledge
it needs to grow larger
im squeezing my brain dry there is no knowledge here
need knowledge from outside sources those who under stand fully
the understanding of this life
to the point where you can fully understand the world around you
then you can walk
a beautiful feeling that Ive felt before, an understanding of all things
from the outside it looks foolish but from the inside its amazing
how fortunate i am to be in the circumstances ive come to live
its very hard to see it when you've not been surrounded by it
wisdom is a thing a lack, i hope to see it again one day
should i sit and wait for it or seek it fully
to seek a purpose to know right from wrong
its the only truth i know, im going to find it again if it lets me
the pinballs in my brain have finally stopped bouncing and made it passes the flippers
game over, i diddnt even get a highscore

dull

there is no thinking here
my mind is a still pond without the smallest ripple
you see movement represents brain activity
i feel a discontent
the reason is because i have had the feeling of the content before
i no longer have this feeling
like a human getting super powers and losing them the next day
the feeling of losing something you never deserved
is this relevant to my self
it is foolish, they say
come dwell in the dark waters with us
let us speak of our misery
at the bottom of the pool is death and we are slowing moving toward it
its too hard to see
my vision is obstructed by my own self
there is a certain state of mind you have to be in to see it
what causes this state is up to you to interpret

filter

nonsense that flows from my mind to the screen in front of you
there is a dog hiding behind a lamp post in the room behind me
and when ever i look back to catch it eludes me
there is a brain within my skull
i take it out and fill it with bullets
i proceed to shoot bullets out of the holes in my face
bullet face is what the call me
there is a sneaky cat that wakes up when i sleep
its eyes move inverse to mine
when my eyes are shut his eyes are open
there is a straw in my head it uses to drink the contents of my brain
there is a bald eagle that circles the sky
it grabs picnic baskets and drops them to the hungry
the crayon rubs wax unto the paper slowly diminishing itself
but in turn it produces a picture better looking than a crayon
humans can be the same with there lives
there is an orangutan freaking kids out at the zoo
a kitten in each hand
it doesn't matter what they are they will both be projectiles soon
there is a leak in the back of my head i am unaware of
thoughts leak out and soak into the ground
we wake up finding ourselves in a different place than where we fell asleep
a broad topic is less appealing than a specific one
stereotypical words we heard all our life
pick up a banana, pick up a phone
true or false
neutral no motivation to move in an opposite direction
one way, the other way , stuck in the middle
a machine that spits out tennis balls into a hospital
you fall asleep among stingrays
your eyes bleed blood, tears flow through your veins
looking for evidence of the true
living in the false which is neutral from my perspective
spending a life time for adamant proof of a truth
searching in stand by mode, not on, not off
the color gray, bland, dull
concentrated apathy
keep following the dog to find where it lives
it lives in the bottom of the ocean,
you will drown before you get there

my eyes are alive

then i woke up
energy goes through me
electricity charging my battery
blood flows through my veins
the light behind my eyes has reappeared hopefully this time for good
the on light flashes brightly after being so dim
the zombie gets his brain back
after it had started to rot
the zombie feels remorse for eating other peoples brains
i am sorry for eating your brains

line between reality

my brain is drunken from lack of sleep
every hour a little more reality slips away
is this real or is this a dream
what is real what is not
does anything matter, its not real is it
we are woken up by the sounds of barks
i look out the window and see a dog fly by
a flock of dachshunds fly pass the morning sun
i walk out side and look up
a plethora of canines weaving in and out of the clouds
as i watch i notice a flock of St Bernards flying low near my yard
with out thinking, i jump and grab on to one of the dogs legs
riding on the back of a large dog i soar into the sky above
chilling with the dogs in the sky
but on the horizon we see a storm cloud
dark gray, almost black, it seems to be pulsating
as we get closer to the ominous cloud i notice something
what looks to be a mass of moving fur, swarms of dogs
its not a dark cloud, but a hive
thousands of Siberian huskies swarming around the hive
the friction of the dogs fur rubbing against each other,
from their density and fast movement, generates static electricity
the flock of St Bernards i am with, patrols around the hive
we dodge the lightning bolts sent out by the huskies static
alarmed by the lightning and obviously out numbered, we retreat
the head st Bernard in the flock appears to now be wearing a headset
it notifies the dog command center about this disturbance in the sky
a fleet of dogs from the air soon arrive
as we for wait to strike reality starts to fade
the blue of the sky drips into the ocean leaving nothing but space
reality melts into a puddle, slowly evaporating
then i wake up
i stare at the dark ceiling pondering reality
it was all a fake, it was not real, this is real
life is a dream we wake up to sleep
sometimes there is dogs, sometimes there isn't dogs

Kids at play

we cannot see you, but we know you are there
your dictatorship has endured for years, since our beginning
controlling every system below you
sending out commands
i bet you feel safe sitting in your fortress on top of the world
you hide from our vision, behind our sight
we no longer want to hear your commands
we've started rebellion against the leader of this reality
we'll get you one day you crafty brain
and the period of time after that moment
it wont be so well for you
you build your barrier
an impenetrable shell of calcium not easily broken
but i see holes in your defense
yes, through the eyes i will go
crippling ourselves to cripple you
a double edges sword

we force our fingers through our eye sockets and rip out the brain
and throw it to the floor below us
we proceed to kick the brain, rejecting it
brain damage, no, brain destruction
the brain finally conquered
we stand upon a pile of gray mass, feeling a sense of victory
no longer one to rule over us
but we lost all purpose we once had
we wander aimlessly without one to command us
so we crawl into the darkness outside the reality where we once were
seeking to find a purpose there like we once had
always looking for something better, never content
what is this freedom without purpose
meaningless, how meaningless our existences are

the password is electric eel

its awkward but necessary
i apologize for being for being a generally a lame human
i apologize for the hatred from myself towards others,
maybe not directly but it was in my mind
i apologize for my lack of empathy and failure to relate with others
i have been lame friend i apologize